Remembering Those Special Days

Wanna know how to get your husband to remember your birthday, anniversary, Valentine’s Day, or other special occasion?  I have a novel idea for you, that has worked well for me these past 7 years.    

Tell him!

My husband is horrible with calendars.  His mind just simply doesn’t work that way.  Quiz him on the date of my birthday and, given some time to think, he will probably get it.  Ask him how far away that is and he will have no clue (He would need time to figure out which month we were in first).  He just lives each day one at a time and counts on me, his faithful PDA wife to keep him from missing planned events. 

I, however, could tell you the birth date of my elementary school friend whom I  haven’t seen in over 15 years (can your PDA do that?).  And to top it off, I LOVE holidays.  I continually look forward to the next holiday… we’ve had Flag Day celebrations and cinco de Mayo dinners… but birthdays are the biggest deal of all.  (With Jesus' birth at Christmas being the number 1 celebrated event at our house)!  My excitement for my birthday is very similar to that of my 4 year old sons for his own.  I really am looking that much forward to it.  I don’t know what it is, but I have always been that way.  I love my birthday and love celebrating it.  I just think it is so cool that it is your day, the day you were born.  (Perhaps this makes me a bit self centered).

Now, I could say, "Well, if he really loved me, he’d just remember my birthday."   But, what kind of PDA would I be if I told him everything but the dates I cared about? And what good does that do me?  I know without a doubt that my husband loves me deeply.  I also know that if I didn’t mention that my birthday was coming he’d get to the day or or day after and have to enter a date on something and suddenly realize he’s in trouble.  Would this make me happier on my birthday? 

Instead, I tell him.  About a month before I say, "My birthday is in a month." About two weeks before (right about the time when I know shipping dates for online ordering start to matter) I say something again.   I actually do the same for him.  He would seriously have no idea that his birthday was only one month away if I didn’t start counting down for him in late April (I can’t even fathom such a lack of anticipation).

This could seem to some like nagging, but I can honestly say it isn’t.    I remember our first summer of married life we were about 5 weeks from my birthday and I brought it up (not as a reminder but b/c I was just excited that it was coming up in 5 weeks)  and I said something like, "I don’t think your excited enough about my birthday… it’s only 5 weeks away!"  This totally made my husband laugh. 

In honor of my birthday this week,  I wanted to share what works for me with wives who have husbands that may not think in terms of days and months.  Lovingly remind him of the day, give him ample warning to prepare, and then enjoy your special day.  To find out what works for others, check out Rocks in My Dryer.